What Happened in August?
August was actually a shit month for me. Mostly because I was wicked depressed and anxious all month as I sorted out a bunch of grownup stuff that I didn’t want to deal with. This grownup stuff included getting everything in order for both Sidney and I to return to school. I also struggled to find daycare because our provider retired this year, which was a huge source of stress! And I still don’t have any daycare for after school. Fortunately my mom is able to help out at least for a while.
My summer co-op ended mid-August, and just finishing up felt like torture. Not because I didn’t enjoy the job, because I loved it! But because of my anxiety/depression. Every day felt like it dragged on and I wanted to sleep all the time.
Truthfully, I get depressed every year in August. I don’t know why! Maybe it’s the stress of wanting to do more, feeling pressured to have super amounts of fun, or knowing it’s all gonna be over soon and having to get ready to go back to school or something.
The bummer thing about being depressed in August is missing out on all of the summer fun I should be having! We only get so many warm days and I feel like I wasted half of them. On a positive note, we did get to go camping!
August Goal Recap
I’m gonna tell you right now that my goals from August were really a hit and miss. Personal goals went smooth, but my professional goals went down the toilet when my latest depressive episode hit hard.
I like setting goals for myself, even if I don’t reach them all the time. I find it’s easier to distinguish personal and professional goals, but from now on to keep myself less overwhelmed I’m going to try to stick to three goals at a time.
Wake Up 6:30 a.m.
I made it my mission to start waking up early in August after reading Miracle Morning. While I didn’t (and still haven’t) practiced the Miracle Morning routine like I want to, I did get up early every weekday in August! And I am still doing so! Except, instead of waking up at 6:30 a.m. I actually get up around 7.
Eat at Home
Eating at home more often is still a bit of a struggle since I’m lazy and hate cooking, but I’m getting better at making it a priority. I started to purchase healthier groceries that are still easy to make, like frozen veggies and fresh meats. And going camping for an entire week really forced me to eat grocery foods instead of eating out. So that helped!
However, I’m still trying to eat at home more, to the point where I eat at home 99 per cent of the time.
We were going for walks every night until recently, because every day we’ve been packing up our belongings and moving them into our new place. Which is like walking, but even more so because there are a lot of stairs involved.
I failed all of my professional goals! I was too depressed and stressed to do anything about any of it and I let it slide. Oh well.
I’m going to keep my goals pretty light this month. I’m still feeling super down in the dumps and anxious AF. I don’t know how much I can handle to be honest.
My life is a hot mess.
Like I mentioned above, we recently got a new place. It’s another townhouse rental, but unfortunately it’s only a 2-bedroom (so no more home office, boo). We’re still in the same neighbourhood, like a five minute walk from where we are now, so that’s not too bad.
Our reason for moving is strange and I won’t get into it but let’s just say we didn’t have much of a choice.
The annoying part is, we literally just moved last year around this time and moving is a big pain in the ass. But, it has to be done. At this point we have most of our smaller unessential items already in the new place, and are left with furniture and clothes and whatnot. Over the next week we’ll be moving all of that over and hopefully we’ll be done by the weekend!
Once that’s done, it will be time to sort everything out and make our new place feel like home. Which is my goal for this month and I hope to share our journey along the way.
No More Alcohol
Last school term I gave up alcohol so I could focus on school and it resulted in my best GPA ever! Also, alcohol really contributes to my anxiety and depression, and I probably shouldn’t drink it while on medication, but y’know, I do.
Anyway, I decided to not drink again while in school. So, another goal for this month (and the next few) is to not drink any alcohol! I’ll probably have some around the winter holidays, but that’s it until next summer!
Excel in School
I’m back in school, doing my third year of my degree program, and really hoping to step it up as a student! I don’t want to just do the assignments, but I want to do more. I want to get involved. I want to network. I want to grow as a student, as a professional, and as a person.
Cut Out Pork
I’m really struggling in life right now. I don’t know why or how to fix it, but I feel lost. Which is why I decided I need to start doing the things I want in life, and stop making excuses. One of those things is to go vegan.
I’ve been vegan off and on since I was 13 years old but never last more than a few months. But, I think one way to make it stick is to do a slow transition, and, so, I decided to start by cutting out pork from my diet. From there I will then cut out beef, then all meat, then eggs, dairy and other animal by-products.
More on this later, but this is one of my goals for September/October.
Making professional goals feels weird for now. After spending the summer working my butt off growing my new business, I had to take a step back for a bit because my anxiety got the best of me. I don’t know if I want to overwork myself while I’m in school. But, I do want to keep blogging and playing around online, and so I’m hoping to just have fun with this little online space rather than taking it seriously!
I’ve been really thinking about what it is I want to do in life after I graduate. What kind of career I want, and how blogging plays into that. My dream employer would be the library here in my city. I love them so much and have been a volunteer since 2013. I even did my journalism student placement with them in their PR department. But that’s not a for sure thing, and might never be. I hate all of this uncertainty at times, and this need to have it all figured out.
But, I do love blogging. I love art and photography. I love being creative.
I keep thinking I need to change my blog into something that could one day be profitable, but now I’m not so sure that’s what I want. And that’s all I have to say for now.
August sucked, hopefully September is better, and maybe one day I can be an actual functioning adult. Who knows?!
What are your goals for September?